All You Need To Know About the Joseph Rakofsky Thing: Philly Style

This is the story all about how,
Some law blogs got turned upside down
I’d like to take a minute, just sit right there,
And I’ll tell you how Rakofsky became the biggest dolt in the legal blogosphere.

In the state of Florida, Rakofsky was born and raised,
But trolling NY courthouses is where he spent most of his days.
Chilling out, soliciting, breaking ethical rules,
Taking on big cases actin’ like a fool.
When a couple of bloggers, who were up to no good,
Started making trouble in his neighborhood.
He defended one little murder trial and the judge got scared,
β€œYou’re incompetent!” that judge declared.

Rakofsky looked for a fight, and when it came near,
The license plate said β€œRANDAZZA” and it had “murum aries attigit” in the mirror.
Randazza said, β€œWe can work this out, I bet”,
But Rakofsky responded, β€œnah man forget it, I’ll just sue the internet!”
Rakofsky sued a ton of legal bloggers just like that, but the bloggers responded β€œGo shit in a hat!”
Rakofsky looked up at his kingdom, he was finally there,
The biggest dolt in the legal blogosphere.

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